请教英语高手帮我修改一下英语复试自我介绍,急用,Goodafternoon,dearprofessors!Itismygreathonortobehereforthisinterview.Mynameisxxx.I’m23yearsoldandIcomefromaverybeautifulCoastalcity

请教英语高手帮我修改一下英语复试自我介绍,急用,Goodafternoon,dearprofessors!Itismygreathonortobehereforthisinterview.Mynameisxxx.I’m23yearsoldandIcomefromaverybeautifulCoastalcity–青岛.I'llbegra

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请教英语高手帮我修改一下英语复试自我介绍,急用,

Goodafternoon,dearprofessors!

Itismygreathonortobehereforthisinterview.Mynameisxxx.I’m23yearsoldandIcomefromaverybeautifulCoastalcity–青岛.I'llbegraduatedwithmajorof"xxx"inxxxUniversityinJuly2011.Meanwhile,Iamaimingforthecontinuousstudiesofxx专业inXX学校.

Ihavebeenworkingdiligentlyatmymajor.Ihavebuiltupasolidfoundationforprofessionalknowledgeandcomprehensivelyimprovedmyquality.

Iamamanfullofpassionandenthusiasm）.AlwaysIaminterestedinfreshthingsandIwillbeenergeticwhenconfrontedwithdifficulties.Iamaperseverantperson.OnceIsetmyselfagoal,Iwillfightforitwithallmyeffortsuntilthelastmoment.Iamalsoaneasygoingpersonenjoyingafinerelationshipwithpeoplearoundandatthesametime,I’malsoamanofteamspirit.

Inmysparetime,Ilikedoingsomesportsandreadingsomenews.Tabletennisandjoggingaremyfavoritesport.Theykeepmeingoodhealth,fullofenergyandbreedoptimismtowardslife.Byreadingnews,Icouldknowwhat’sgoingoninthesociety.

IhavelongadmiredXX学校becauseofitshighlyqualifiedfacultyandstrongacademicenvironmentinthefieldofXX专业.IamconfidentthatIamaveryqualifiedapplicantforyoursubjectgroup.

Peoplealwayssaidwhenyougetupinthemorning,youhave2choices:(1)goonsleeping,goondreaming;(2)getuptopursueyourdream.I'llchoosethe2ndchoice-topursuemydream.Isincerelyhopethatyou,dearProfessors,willgrantmeachancetopursuemydream

最好能说明下为什么这么改让我也知道个所以然...

陈洪芳回答：

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　　Goodafternoon,dearprofessors!Itismygreathonortobehereforthisinterview.Mynameisxxx.I’m23yearsoldandIcomefromaverybeautifulCoastalcity–青岛.I'llgraduatefromxxxUniver...

康利刚回答：

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　　你好，我刚看了一下，前面的改正都很好，谢谢了，不知道后面的还需要怎么改？能再帮忙指点下吗？

陈洪芳回答：

网友采纳

　　Inmysparetime,Ilikedoingsomesports.Tabletennisandjoggingaremyfavorite.Theymakemehealthy,energeticandholdingapositiveattitudetowardslife.Inaddition,Ialwaysreadnewspapers,whichhelpmekeepabreastofcurrentaffairs.IhavelongadmiredXX学校becauseofitsabundantteachingresourcesandqualityteachingandscientificresearchstrengthinXX专业。IfirmlybelievethatIamaveryqualifiedapplicantforyoursubjectgroup.Tosumitallup.Asthesayinggoes:whenyougetupinthemorning,youhave2choices:goonsleeping,goondreaming;orgetuptopursueyourdream.I'llchoosethe2ndchoice-topursuemydream.Isincerelyhopethatyou,dearProfessors,willopendoorsformetopursuemydream.句型有点单一，句与句间可以再加些关联词润色一下，祝你好运

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