求托福改作文两篇希望能帮我改一下两篇作文,大概能得多少分,然后那些地方需要改进.第一篇是TPO-15的综合写作ViewsvarydrasticallybetweentheauthorandthelectureronhowtoerasethecanetoadsfromAustrali|小学作文问答-字典翻译问答网

求托福改作文两篇希望能帮我改一下两篇作文,大概能得多少分,然后那些地方需要改进.第一篇是TPO-15的综合写作ViewsvarydrasticallybetweentheauthorandthelectureronhowtoerasethecanetoadsfromAustrali

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问题描述：

求托福改作文两篇

希望能帮我改一下两篇作文,大概能得多少分,然后那些地方需要改进.

第一篇是TPO-15的综合写作

ViewsvarydrasticallybetweentheauthorandthelectureronhowtoerasethecanetoadsfromAustraliawhichhavecausedsevereecologicalproblemsinthecountry.Eachpartyhasreasonableopinionandconvincingevidence.

Theauthorproposesthefirstmethodthatwecouldbuildanationalfencetoblocktheadvanceofthetoads.Thisapproachisreliableforthereasonthatithasbeenusebeforeandturnedouttothepositiveresults.Inthecontrast,thelecturerbelievesthatthisapproachhasafataldisadvantagethatitcouldn’terasethetoadsintheriversandstreams.Thetoadscouldstillestablishfromonesidetotheother.

Theauthorinsiststhattoadscouldbecapturedanddestroyedbyvolunteers.Youngtoadsandcanetoadeggsareespeciallyeasiertogatheranddestroy.Doubtisexpressedbythelecturerontheotherhand.Admittedlythemethodwillgetsomesuccess,butitcouldcauseecologicaldisasterwhentheuntrainedvolunteershavedifficultyindistinguishingthetoadsandthenativefrogsespeciallytheimmatureones.

Opinioniscastbytheauthorthatakindofdisease-causingvirusdevelopedresearcherscouldbeanefficaciouswaytocontrolthecantoadpopulations.Itwillpreventthetoadsfrommaturingandreproducingwithouthurtingotherspecies.However,thelecturerstronglydisapprovesitduetoriskofdamage.TheinfectedspecieswhicharetransportedtotheSouthAmericacoulddoharmtothenativeoneswhicharevitalinthatenvironment.Therewillbeabigpricetopaywhenthenativespeciessufferthisinfection.

另一篇发不上来

李宝林回答：

网友采纳

　　哈哈,你写的很不错啊——用了很多高档句型和结构! 　　不过,里面还有个别失误.现修改如下：　　ViewsvarydrasticallybetweentheauthorandthelectureronhowtoerasethecanetoadsfromAustraliawhichhavecausedsevereecologicalproblemsinthecountry.Eachpartyhasreasonable【opinion——opinions最好用复数】andconvincingevidence. 　　Theauthorproposesthefirstmethodthatwe【could——can】buildanationalfencetoblocktheadvanceofthetoads.Thisapproachisreliableforthereasonthatithasbeen【use——used】beforeandturnedoutto【have】【the去掉】positiveresults.Inthecontrast,thelecturerbelievesthatthisapproachhasafataldisadvantagethatit【couldn’t——can't】erasethetoadsintheriversandstreams.Thetoads【could——can】still【establish——existandprosper】fromonesidetotheother. 　　Theauthorinsiststhattoads【could——can】becapturedanddestroyedbyvolunteers.Youngtoadsandcanetoadeggsareespeciallyeasiertogatheranddestroy.Doubtisexpressedbythelecturerontheotherhand.Admittedlythemethodwillgetsomesuccess,butit【could——can】causeecologicaldisasterwhentheuntrainedvolunteershavedifficultyindistinguishingthetoadsandthenativefrogsespeciallytheimmatureones. 　　Opinioniscastbytheauthorthatakindofdisease-causingvirusdeveloped【加by】researchers【could——can】beanefficaciouswaytocontrolthe【can——cane】toadpopulations.Itwillpreventthetoadsfrommaturingandreproducingwithouthurtingotherspecies.However,thelecturerstronglydisapprovesitdueto【加the】riskofdamage.TheinfectedspecieswhicharetransportedtotheSouthAmerica【could——can】doharmtothenativeoneswhicharevitalinthatenvironment.Therewillbeabigpricetopay【when——if避免与上面重复】thenativespeciessufferthisinfection. 　　说明：按照时态和语义表达,文中的could最好改为can.不过,有个别的不该可以.例如最后一个不改也能讲通. 　　按照30分计算的话,你写的可以得到23——26分.